Twelve pillars – Jim Rohn

Which values do you have in life and which metaphor do you find valuable?

Encounters with new, sometimes random people can have an everlasting impact on your life.

Stick around and trust in those with good intentions. 

I am glad I came across this book. Because it is just like the book, a spontaneous encounter that changes my values. The main character in the book has a problem with his car and finds help from an older man who turns out to be a wise man. The help he gets is invaluable and indescribable and came at the right time. There was a lot in his life that had not fallen into place. The older man, who turns out to have a keen interest in gardening, fascinates the car owner, and me, so much that a mutual friendship develops. Even after the first meeting, an understanding of the other has begun to grow. The metaphor that life is a garden that you sometimes, unfortunately, tend more than your own mental and physical health is a nice one.

Fiction can be so close to reality that you live in the story. The emotions are believable. The characters become my friends and in my eyes the authors have done a phenomenal job. Jim Rohn and his co-author Chris Widener are of this kind. Although the book is short, I need to read it at different times. There is no rushing to the last page. The story reflects life and that is how I want to approach the moral and the message of the book. If there is too much, a large part is unfortunately forgotten.

If you look too hard for something, you miss what is right in front of you. When I broke up with my last boyfriend in the summer of 2002, I decided to put the topic of boyfriends on the side for a long time to come. What happened the night I said this in October 2002? Well, I met my current husband. We were going to meet that way. That was the idea. During our first date, it turned out that we had met at a hairdresser’s barely three weeks earlier. As I write this, I smile big at the memory. Great memories. Back then, we didn’t know what life would offer us.

“Twelve Pillars”, as the book is called, consists of twelve messages/pillars. Your life should be made up of these pillars because then you can build a life that lasts. Some of these pillars stand out more than others.

 

“The only way things are going to change for you is when you change.” (page 1)

That’s my favourite message and it’s the first one. It is the center of the book. Just there, the book has captured me and I am thrilled. Sitting on my couch at home on a cold winter day, I read the first chapter. Of course, I stop and let my thoughts come and go, as they deserve. I don’t control them and that’s the point.

As I write this, I am sitting in a café in the center of Zurich. Our youngest daughter is visiting an English high school that she is interested in attending after secondary school. At the café I see a homeless man carrying his story. A family with two teenage daughters happily putting on makeup before going on a trip. One man has three large cups of hot drinks. The man next to him has two screens out. Young students come and go. What can I have in common with these people? That we choose this place to sit down for a while to refuel some energy. Laughter is heard and I smile to hear the sound of laughter.

“Formal education will make you a living. Self-education will make you a fortune.” (page 57).

Life gives you invaluable knowledge about yourself and life itself. It doesn’t always have to be about money alone. Life itself is an enrichment and it is the icing on your cake that makes you unique. Even if you are unique from the start and that comes out in the book. Your friends become the ingredients of your icing.

Choose carefully because you are shaped by your friends.

Have you experienced becoming a “seeker”? That a certain event made you rethink and review your values, goals, demands and expectations? Think about it, is that it? I answer yes.

“The major reason for setting a goal is for what it makes of you to accomplish it.” (page 31)

That pillar fits me and this context.

The year 2022 was the year that made me need to change all these parts of my life. Too much had happened. The family started the year getting sick with Covid and I had a couple of side effects. My mother had to move to a dementia home, I had a surgery on my foot and got four screws that 2.5 years later are still there, my daughter ended up in the emergency room after 24 wasp stings.

In the end, I suffered from stress symptoms and could not do any of the things I love to do. The turning point was when my youngest daughter suffered from the same symptoms; she lived in symbiosis with me. Her greatest security in life, her mother/me, involuntarily disrupted her life. It was time to review the whole life situation. Slowly, we came back to a calmer and more stable existence.

Conclusion; To summarize my thoughts on the book, it is the following pillar, number 11, that I refer to;

“To lead others is to help them change their thoughts, beliefs and actions for the better.” (page 89)

Why read this book

Why read this book? How important the depth of our lives is and what we rely mentally on to support us. 

Three main take-aways from reading this book:

1. Stop, pause, let go regularly

2. The importance of spontaneous encounters

3. Having the willingness to change

Questions and reflections:

1.When was the last time that you sat down and intensively and actively reflected on your life?

2. When and where might you have met a person that changed your path in life?

3. How intentionally do you work on reviewing and evaluate your values in life?

“Your level of success will seldom exceed your level of personal development.” – Jim Rohn